Whilst out and about having a whiskey with a friend and watching the NC Double F basketball tournament we waxed poetic about our team’s chances in the big dance. My Alma-Mater the University of Idaho had a tough first round matchup with Houston. While my state loyalty team, the University of Missouri played the next day.
Our mutual favorite St. Louis University was playing right then and I asked my friend when his team, Kansas, was up. He told me they were playing at 8:40 tomorrow. Late game? No, we’re playing in San Diego. How did Kansas end up in the West Region? We’re not, we’re in the East Region.
Old Man Rant Incoming
Gird you loins NC Double F, batten down the hatches, it’s time for a full-on, no-holds-barred, blistering, get off my lawn you pesky kids, Old Man Rant!
What in the ever-loving majesty of creation is going on? Kansas is from the Midwest, in the East Region, and playing their first-round game in California. Next thing you’ll tell me is you summed two even integers and derived an odd integer.
Turns out the folks in Kansas are a tad bit upset about this and I agree with them. To be clear, to illustrate the profundity of the stupidity, let me reiterate; I’m from Missouri. As far as I’m concerned, the last issue anyone from Kansas had correct was their take on slavery.
Who’s running this operation? Put Ron and Leslie in charge of this little rec league thing you’ve got going on NC Double F. Dean Wormer has you lower on the GPA list than Bluto. Ringo songs have more harmony.
You’re screwing up the tournament faster than 186,000 mps (299,792 kps). You’re running this tournament like Edward Smith ran the Titanic. This is so stupid even Dolly Parton wouldn’t pull you up on that door.
How many NC Double F officials does it take to screw up their cash cow? Depends, how many are you willing to bribe?
How does an NC Double F official’s brain cell die? Alone.
All in the pursuit of money, I guess. Some bean counter somewhere decided that a game in California was better than a game on the East Coast.
In the old days, when I was a wee lad, sometime after dirt but before Google, a team from the Midwest was placed in the Midwest Region and played their games at Midwest venues. That way their fans got to see them at a reasonable time of day and could travel to the game. I guess that’s just crazy talk now.
Kids today! Back when! Common sense!
Rant over, return to your AI programmed lives.
Tom Liberman







I wrote the other day about a